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Are Stepparents Real Parents? Are Biological Parents Best?

© copyright 2007 Betsy L. Angert

More than a month ago, I began writing this treatise. The significance of stepparents and adopted parents was on my mind. Gerald R. Ford had passed and there was ample discussion of his heritage. Gerald Rudolff Ford Senior did not father his son in a biological sense. Still, the elder Ford was Daddy. Jerry Ford spoke of his father often and how significant he was in the his life. The elder Ford raised his son as any parent would, even though he was actually a stepparent. Ford, the President was not adopted until he in his twenties. At that age, an adoption was perhaps a gesture; after all Jerry Ford was legally an adult. Gerald R. Ford Junior wanted to honor his father or the man that, young Jerry truly felt was Daddy.

I too was fathered by a man not my biological match. For years, this gentle human choose to relate to me as if I was his own offspring. Legally, we had no connection. Let us call him "Adam," was my stepparent. Yet, this soft-spoken man was my Dad. Long before I could, with permission from the government, call him Daddy he nurtured my heart, mind, and spirit. I too am adopted; my adoption was long in coming. For years my biological father, perchance, we can title him Michael, refused to give his permission. In some states, possibly all, this is necessary. As I listened to President Ford's history, I thought of how it mirrored my own.

Couples, Communication and Caring ©

In a nation where forty plus, fifty, or sixty percent of marriages end in divorce, [depending who whose statistics you trust] the topic of companionship and connections is a must. In a country where many are separated, where children are left alone, and families are not intact, the quality of relationships is a necessary consideration. This week, the New York Times addressed this concern in two articles, Marriage Is Not Built on Surprises and Questions Couples Should Ask (Or Wish They Had) Before Marrying. I, as many do, have an active interest in this matter.

Yesterday, I spoke with an acquaintance. She seems to be happy in her current relationship; she says she is. I remember when her beau was a source of great stress. Jess was involved in his work and Lisa wanted him to be concerned with her. She tried and tried to change what was. Lisa turned to other men; Jess was upset. Still, transformation was slow in coming. The relationship came and went, repeatedly. Now the two are one, or are they?

Utopia. Universal Declaration of Human Rights Lives and Dies ©

Written December 9, 2006 Yesterday was a day in memorial. Many remembered and honored the life and passing of musician, composer John Lennon. Throughout the day, I found myself singing the Lennon tune "Imagine." I often do "Imagine all the people living life in peace." I speak of this vision. I write of it faithfully. Many think my thoughts are silly and they say so. I might remark as John Lennon himself did, "You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one. I hope someday you'll join us, and the world will be as one."

Today, I discovered others believed as I do long before I was born. Many post-World War II people were impelled to reflect on human rights and the atrocities individuals and groups imposed on one another. It was determined poverty, such as that found in Germany prior to Hitler's rule, leaves people vulnerable and hurting. In such a state, they are likely to aggress. The recognized since we, worldwide live on one planet together, and with thanks to the advent of technological miracles we are no longer separate entities, the seas no longer divided us, we must work in unison to create global peace. We as a civilization were mobile. We were and are connected worldwide. They concluded and I concur we must honor this reality.

Utopia. Universal Declaration of Human Rights Lives and Dies ©

Written December 9, 2006
Yesterday was a day in memorial. Many remembered and honored the life and passing of musician, composer John Lennon. Throughout the day, I found myself singing the Lennon tune "Imagine." I often do "Imagine all the people living life in peace." I speak of this vision. I write of it faithfully. Many think my thoughts are silly and they say so. I might remark as John Lennon himself did, "You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one. I hope someday you'll join us, and the world will be as one."

Today, I discovered others believed as I do long before I was born. Many post-World War II people were impelled to reflect on human rights and the atrocities individuals and groups imposed on one another. It was determined poverty, such as that found in Germany prior to Hitler's rule, leaves people vulnerable and hurting. In such a state, they are likely to aggress. The recognized since we, worldwide live on one planet together, and with thanks to the advent of technological miracles we are no longer separate entities, the seas no longer divided us, we must work in unison to create global peace. We as a civilization were mobile. We were and are connected worldwide. They concluded and I concur we must honor this reality.

Thanksgiving. Will Our Past, Our Present Be Prologue? ©

As the celebration continues and the cynicism mounts, a delivery was made to me. I thank William S. Burroughs for his Thanksgiving Prayer. I am grateful to bzbb of My Left Wing fame. S/he shared the text and resource with me.

After reading my Thanksgiving story of genocide, some decided that they knew I loathe the holiday; I do not. I do have disdain for humans that knowingly hurt other humans. I am disquieted when I realize that man, woman, or child intentionally commits crimes against nature.

When people speak against "evil" and then act in ways that I think they might deem "sinful" I am confused. While, I personally do not believe in either concept, I wonder why those that do think these constructs are valid behave in ways that could be defined as wicked.

Income Inequity. The Real Reason the Rich Get Richer. ©

Income inequity has been in the news of late; disparity is increasing. Jared Bernstein, of the Economic Policy Institute, wrote of this in, “The Catch-Up Economy.” Paul Krugman, a writer-economist for the New York Times shared his views in “Left Behind Economics.” Economics Professor J. Bradford DeLong comments on the subject. However, it seems to me that the views of these learned economists are limited. While assessing the statistics, I think experts miss the substance, what lies behind simple “economic” causes and effects.

Facts, Fictions, Feuds, Fallacies, and Fun ©

I received an interesting electronic correspondence, a means for finding direction. Dear reader, I am offering a political compass or a practical guide. I endeavor to help each of us find truth, myself included.

I observe, healthy or not, humans characteristically categorize persons, places, and philosophies. They consider their beliefs correct. The viewpoints of others are flawed. Conventional wisdoms prosper. Individuals and groups are certain they are “right”; their truth is reality. What others regard as prudent is said to be “just plain wrong.” Yet how do we know; are we able to comprehend what is beyond our belief. I suspect few try. Nevertheless, I hope to provide opportunities for exploration or reflection.

My Lessons, Angst, and Challenges ©

“It is time to go to school,” mother calls gently. “No, I don’t wanna!” I scream. I continue, “You can’t make me.” “Oh yes, I can!” she exclaims. Now she is getting angry. I start calling her names and then I decide to play the martyr. I say sobbingly, “You don’t love me anymore.” Finally, I resort to lecturing her on the finer points of how to best raise a child. I speak to her of what it means to be part of a loving family. I cite chapter and verse, for surely she does not understand. If she loved me, she would let me be.

She defends herself against my barbarous claims. She attempts to provide examples. I rant; I rage. Who does she think she is? She does not own me. I am autonomous. I know what is best for me. We battle, we argue, and reluctantly, I trudge off to school.

For me, school is a calm place. I excel in this environment.

You Do Not Understand! Communities and Communication ©

This was intended to be a short statement, a response to a discussion. I was writing a missive on the subject, similar in scope, though not in tone. My intention was to offer a well thought out essay. I was going to present political posturing as evidence for what we as humans do. However, once the comment was complete I concluded the personal might be more effective.

I wrote more than I thought I might and realized, as an observation tucked neatly within a thread few would read this. I think this treatise addresses more than what takes place at My Left Wing. It speaks to an archetype. This essay looks at communities and communication within these. My experience and sharing is likely applicable to world politics and to national interests. This tome is about life, yours, mine, and ours. It discusses what we do to destroy the connections we as living, breathing, and loving beings crave.

I invite you to share your stories, your thoughts, the lessons you learned. Teach me; I am your student.

Press Secretary Tony Snow Cried. He and I Touched Humanity. ©

This passage is not political in nature. It is about people. When Press Secretary Snow thought of how fragile his own life was, he cried. When a homeless man helped me to recall how lovely life can be when we care, he touched my heart. Tears flowed down my face.
This story is about Tony Snow, a homeless man, humanity, and me. I will begin with Press Secretary Snow. My focus will not be on the unforgivable term, though I too struggle with its usage. Instead, I will discuss what for me, was a more meaningful lesson.

In this day and age of snarky, once known as snide, rude, and crude, it was a delight to witness genuine emotion.